Mad Cow Chronicles

This one needs a little introduction, particularly if you’re not current on the concept of ‘public domain’.

See, any creative work fixed in any tangible medium- my blog posts, the soundtrack to Star Wars, a photograph of a rose- is given, immediately upon its creation, something called a copyright. The copyright is usually (not always, but usually) owned by the creator, and basically states that, by international law and treaty, the creator has certain rights regarding the work- the right to reproduce it, to translate it, to move the work from one medium to another (for example: I have the copyright on any blog post I write for this blog. That means that, barring certain exceptions like short quotes, I am the sole and final authority on where these posts can appear. If someone were to make Mad Cow Chronicles: The Book, they’d have to go through me).

So that’s copyright.* Public domain is a little bit different. If either a work has been around for so long (usually, years after the death of the last person to hold the copyright), or because the creator expressly requested it, a work can be made to be ‘public domain’. In essence, this means that the work is no longer copyrighted, and can no longer be copyrighted in its original form. Derivative works, reproductions, translations, transpositions to other media- it’s all fair game. As an example, the works of Jules Verne are no longer copyrighted. If I wanted to print an anthology of Jules Verne, and sell it- there is absolutely nothing to stop me doing so (legally, anyway).

LibriVox is a collection of volunteers who take books that have lapsed or been declared into the public domain, and create recordings- themselves declared public domain- of the books, read aloud. Jules Verne is in there. Gulliver’s Travels is in there. I’m pretty sure you can find Tom Sawyer, too. They’re a great source of free audiobooks, and well worth checking out if you need something to listen to. While the reading quality can vary from volunteer to volunteer- Librivox maintains no quality controls, as they’re more interested in mass volunteer work rather than strict vocal quality- the majority of recordings are excellent.

Librivox can be found at http://www.librivox.org.

Be sure to come back next Monday for “Dragon-Slaying Tactics: Why Wynne Keeps Running Into Melee”!

*Vastly simplified, of course.

Good morning all, and hey, look at that, I’m not dead! It’s been a busy (read: exhausting) couple of weeks in my little corner of Canuckistan, and, alas, cutting corners in the area of blogging was more socially-acceptable than cutting corners in areas such as, say, personal hygiene.

So here I am, back in the as-it-were saddle of the internet, once again loading my digital cannonry to fire bytes upon bytes of pure chaos in your general direction.

So here we go: First post back, and, as I am gravely indebted to Lady Jess, I took a request: “Blog about pretzels!”

Here, then, I am: Blogging about pretzels.

First, so we can establish what’s going on, an illustrative picture.

Ladies and gentlemen, yours truly in kitchen battle garb:

Let’s begin. You will need (assuming you actually want to make pretzels here) the following:

1 tablespoon yeast;

1 tablespoon maple syrup*

3 cups all-purpose flour*

2 tablespoons margarine or butter, softened*

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 cup very warm water (but not boiling)

You will also need:

Two cookie sheets, a small or medium saucepan or pot partly full of water, and roughly a tablespoon of baking soda.

Toppings (coarse salt, black pepper, oregano, Montreal Steak Spice, dried crushed chilies, parmesan cheese, etc)*

*All these ingredients can be substituted for an equal amount of a similar ingredient; maple syrup can be replaced with honey, white sugar, brown sugar, or even Pepsi; flour can be replaced with hard whole wheat flour if you prefer it; I tend to use olive or vegetable oils instead of margarine or butter and, of course, toppings are completely at your own discretion.

Let’s Begin:

Place your yeast and your maple syrup into a medium-large bowl as shown below, adding the oil.

Add the salt

And stir it all up well. Then add the water,

one cup of the flour, and mix very well. The mixture will start to bubble; leave it alone for about five minutes.

After about five minutes, stir in the rest of the flour. The dough should be slightly sticky but not too difficult to work with; turn it out on a lightly floured board and knead.

If the dough persists in sticking to your hands or the work surface, work more flour into it as you knead. Knead for approximately five minutes, then return it to the bowl and allow it to rise in a warm place until it doubles in size (or about sixty to eighty minutes).

Remove the dough from the bowl, punch it down, knead it again for about five minutes, and divide it into twelve equal parts. Roll each of these pieces into a pipe between twelve to eighteen inches long. You now have two options:

1: Cut the pipe into three four-to-six-inch pretzel sticks, or

2: Twist each pipe into the traditional pretzel shape. As you can see below, I took this option with my latest batch.

As you’re shaping the pretzels, put the tablespoon of baking soda into your pot of water and bring it to a boil; you should also, at this time, begin pre-heating the oven to 475. You’re going to boil the pretzels for about a minute on each side, remove them from the water with a slotted spoon, allow them to drain for a moment, and put them on your cookie sheet.

You should add your seasonings to the pretzels the moment they come out of the pot; you can either have a dish of seasoning standing by to press the pretzels into gently, or sprinkle the toppings on.

The pretzels, once they are all boiled, bake at 475 for 12-15 minutes, or until they are golden brown, thus:

Enjoy!

Be sure to drop in on Thursday for “Things That Are Cool: LibriVox"!

I am- if it has not become abundantly clear- something of a geek. I am also, if it has not become abundantly clear, a fan of Star Wars. In what might be considered a big way.

Knights of the Old Republic- a game by BioWare, the geniuses behind Neverwinter Nights, Baldur’s Gate and Dragon Age: Origins- combines my love of Star Wars, my love of RPGs, and my love of swordfights in one glowing, fast-moving, lightning-chucking telekinetically-choking rumble.

I loved it, if you hadn’t gotten that impression.

Tonight, I was at The Heroes’ Lounge (my local comic shop) and I picked up the first couple issues of Dark Horse Comics’ treatment of Knights of the Old Republic. Will it follow the plot of the game? Will it dance around it, showing the story from secondary characters’ points of view?

I don’t know. But my inner ten-year-old is demanding I get off the internet, forget about being at work tomorrow, baking plans for the weekend, and just about everything else… curl up under the blankets, listen to the thunderstorm*, and read about the Knights of the Old Republic.

Should these comics be excellent, I will no doubt be raving about them soon. (Should they be terrible, the same raving will probably be occur, but it might be labelled more of a ‘rant’.)

*I have hooked up my iPod, with an ambient recording of a thunderstorm, on loop, to the sleep timer on my iPod alarm clock. I love thunderstorms, too.

This post has no real purpose other than to let you know that my second batch of soft pretzels in a week is just crisping gently in the oven. I’m sure you all wanted to know this.

The recipe may make its way up, with photographs, when I next prepare it and photograph the process. Or, it may not.

Okay, now this post has a second purpose: If you have ever played and enjoyed Diablo, or any of its sequels, you need to get at least the demo for Torchlight. It’s great.